Hakuna Matata

Yesterday I was walking down the street on my way to work, and I parked on the side of the street was a large while truck.It looked like the grill was growing some foliage. "What did they drive through?" As I got closer, it looked like the "leaves" were moving. I walked right up the truck and noticed something weird about the "leaves." They weren't leaves at all. The entire grill and bumper of this truck was covered in butterflies. Little, helpless monarch butterflies. Their wings were left to blow in the wind. One of the butterflies floated lifelessly down to the street. I followed it's movement to the ground and saw some more bodies scattered across the asphalt. It looked like a battlefield. I stood in awe, thinking about the cloud of butterflies this truck must have driven through to be so thoroughly coated in guts. I'd like to say that I was filled with creativity and inspired to write a powerful blog, however, as I walked in the door I forgot about the butterflies.

Later in the evening while I was sweeping in the lounge, I found myself looking out the window towards the parking space that the truck had been in hours earlier. I noticed the parking space because it was now full of crows. I looked closer and noticed that they were all picking up dead butterflies. Again, I'd like to say that I was filled with inspiration, or that I suddenly had a deeper knowledge or understanding of some profound topic...but instead my co-worker and I started singing this:

Insecurity exists in the absence of knowledge

Last night I had a chance to be completely vulnerable to Jake. I worked really hard to put aside my insecurities and tried to keep my mind from getting in the way. I really feel so much closer to my husband now. I am even more confident that he loves me. I am even more confident that he wants me. I tried to explain this to him, and he really doesn't get it. But there are things that I don't get about him, so it evens out. We just trust that we are being completely honest with each other, and everything else falls into place.

Knowing that Jake will listen to A, do B, and isn't ashamed of knowing C feeds my confidence. Having someone I can bare my soul too and not have to be afraid of ridicule or mockery is truly freeing. It also compels me to do the same for him.

Marriage is a blast.

Help from above

We're moving. Not far. Only a few miles away. But a friend of ours and his family are missionaries over seas, and for the 10 months of the year that they are gone they let people stay in their house for free. The last two years one of the their nieces stayed there because she was going to school near by. This year, they asked us if we would like to stay there. Jake and I talked about the pros and cons for about 27 seconds before we decided "YES!" Besides having a free place to live, it gives us something to tell people when they ask "So what are your life plans?" Now we say "Well, we're living free at a friend's house for a few months, and we're going to be saving up some money. We're praying at this point, and hopefully in 10 months we'll have a better idea of where God wants us, and we'll have the finances to get there." It kills two birds with one stone. The "Are you two young people with a big TV really being wise with your money?" question and it lets them think that we're saving up for whatever it is that they think we should do with our lives: own a house, go to a big college, or start a family or a business...whatever.

God is good. All the time.